|
|
|
|
Guile A magnificent animal of a man
Registered: Sep 2001 Posts: 2659 - Threads: 68 Location: A wretched hive of scum and villainy
|
"YOU ARE THE..."
Brought to you by the makers of the popular hafa thread series:
"WHAT'S MY CRIME?"
This series of threads will put you in different situations were you must use your Criminal Anthropology skill set to achieve success.
In this week's episode...
"YOU ARE THE... CRIMINAL MASTERMIND"
Bank robbers.
They used to be the royalty of the criminal underworld. Back in the day, robbing banks was easy, a "caper" even.
Class Notes:
WILLIE SUTTON, born 1901 died 1980.
40 years a bank robber stole over $2,000,000
Click here to view original image
NEVER SAID:
"I ROB BANKS BECAUSE THAT'S WHERE THE MONEY IS".
HE ACTUALLY SAID:
"I ROB BANKS BECAUSE I ENJOY IT. I LOVE IT. I'M MORE ALIVE WHEN I'M INSIDE A BANK ROBBING IT, THAN AT ANY OTHER TIME IN MY LIFE."
Spent more than half his adult life behind bars.
WHAT A DICKHEAD.
Robbing banks, indeed the whole face of crime has changed.
You are "Mister X" a criminal mastermind. A shadowy figure in the background organising armed crime. As a businessman you understand that crime is an economic activity like any other: it has its profits, its losses, its risks, and its returns.
MISTER X
Click here to view original image
Pinky ring and white cat optional.
In these modern times you seek unauthorised access to databases because that's where the data is. And data is the new currency. Using the darknet and a bespoke programme called THUGnot4LIFE over the years you have recruited, organised and broken up several teams of specialists. One team for jewellery heists, another for robbing footballers mansions and so on. You never actually "go on a job".
You are a 21st. century criminal.
You know successful criminals study econometrics. Statistics can help in all walks of life. Aaaaaaaand statistics show that criminals get caught, they also demonstrate that criminals are habitually stupid. Criminals have a modus operandi, that the police use to catch them.
The successful modern criminal never gets his hands dirty and never gets stuck in a criminal rut a.k.a. modus operandi. Gifted amateurs make the best criminals because Criminal Anthropology shows habitual career criminals are, to be blunt about it: THICK.
The current Team Charlie is responsible for 3 bank heists so far, the members are working well together and have netted you several million pounds profit with no risk to yourself.
You use encrypted communications to pass on instructions, dead letter boxes to pass hard cash, guns, body armour etc and other real life items around and use bitcoins etc to pay your employees.
This is their last job before you abandon them and cut all ties with them forever, before some smart alec copper susses the M.O., the team starts bragging or living beyond their means.
In 24 hours Team Charlie is due to pull a heist at a private bank in Knightsbridge. Team Charlie comprises a hacker, a spotter, a team leader, two shooters and a driver.
Click here to view original image
You hear from the team leader that the driver has had a serious accident at home doing d.i.y. over the bank holiday weekend.
You are unwilling to abandon this job so late in the day but find yourself needing a driver who is unknown to the police and able to boost a vehicle suitable for the job and outdrive any potential pursuit. You know at this late stage most of the replacements will be thick as pig shit criminals and unsuitable for any of your capers.
Using your Criminal Anthropology skill set can you pick out the gifted amateur who wants to do a bank job for the thrills, out of the usual sad selection of scofflaws and dead beats who dream of robbing banks because they are good at Grand Theft Auto?
Ready? You fire up your computer and start browsing mug shots looking for the non-criminal...
Aaaaaaaaaaand lets play:
"YOU ARE THE... CRIMINAL MASTERMIND"
DANNY
Click here to view original image
EMYR
Click here to view original image
SHAUN
Click here to view original image
DAN
Click here to view original image
JONATHON
Click here to view original image
RAY
Click here to view original image
Remember: It's just for fun.
I will publish the results of everyone's choice of driver next week.
Earlier episodes of
"YOU ARE THE..."
can be found here:
#1 THE INVESTOR
#2 THE BEST FRIEND
#3 THE DRUG DEALER
For players who are new to the Theory of Criminal Anthropology, [where have you been?] here are some crib notes:
Anthropological criminology is the study of humans and criminals, based on links between the nature of the crime and the appearance of the offender. According to this theory the following details are common in all criminals:
Lumps and unusual bumps on cranium; northern accent; elongation of the coccyx; carefully ironed jeans; long arms, baldness.
This whole world is out there just trying to score
I've seen enough I don't want to see any more.
Report this post to a moderator |
IP: Logged
|
01-06-2018 13:16 PM |
|
|
|
|
|
voodoobass a table, mes enfants...
Registered: Sep 2003 Posts: 33900 - Threads: 985 Location: somewhere else
|
I'm looking at either Danny or Shaun. Why? Because none of the others look like they would have the modern tech skills to be able to locate and steal a modern, fast car capable of pulling off this kind of job i.e. AMG Mercedes, Audi S line or Golf R.
It needs to be the sort of car that will blend in with most traffic, fit 4 adult passengers, go very fast, and have AWD so it is able to outhandle most police vehicles.
Stealing it will mean locating one via the Internet or staking out an owner's club meet.
Then you need to find out where the car is stored, and purchase equipment to intercept the keyless entry frequencies, since nowadays modern luxury cars can be taken and driven away without a key! Then they will need to find the insurance tracker on the vehicle before it is used on the job, or the game will be up.
Choosing between the two is hard though. Danny looks like he's the likely candidate to have the IT skills but also has probably never driven anything with more than 50cc. Plus his youth will mark him out at the club meets, unless he can pretend to be a Grime producer or something. Shaun, on the other hand, looks like he has plenty of experience weaving through home-time traffic on the M25 in a financed Audi and would definitely blend in at the meets.
I did briefly consider Dan but he looks like he will either crack under pressure or start shooting hostages for no reason.
The other three chaps would be ideal if we were talking old Jags and double-barrel sawn-offs but I doubt any of them have the finesse to steal a new C63 AMG without drawing a lot of attention.
So I'm going to go for Danny and hope that his GTA skills are enough to stop him from crashing the getaway car.
soundcloud.com/voodoobass
mixcloud.com/voodoobass
Report this post to a moderator |
IP: Logged
|
01-06-2018 17:12 PM |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Forum Rules:
You may post new threads You may
post replies You may post attachments You
may edit your posts
|
You may delete your posts
HTML code is OFF
BB Code is ON Smilies are ON
|
|
|
|
|