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HarderFaster Forums >> General Mayhem >> The 10 best jokes from the Edinburgh fringe Author Pages (4):  1  2  3  [4]      ceekay venomous fairy Registered: Feb 2010 Posts: 39935 - Threads: 1064 Location: In a wide open space 2016 Winner Thread Honourable Mention Member Quote: Staggo wrote on 16-08-2017 01:22 PM Will you lot please stop f*****g saying that to me today. I don't even see what I did there! I don't either. "Do you believe in the devil? You know, a supreme evil being dedicated to the temptation, corruption, and destruction of man?" "I'm not sure that man needs the help." (Calvin & Hobbes) Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged 16-08-2017 13:25 PM Matt V2.0 Registered: Apr 2002 Posts: 17728 - Threads: 847 Location: Surrey 2016 Honourable Mention Party Animal [Edited by Matt on 22-08-2017 08:21 AM] And now we have another top list from the fringe, the top 15: 1. "I'm not a fan of the new pound coin, but then again, I hate all change" - Ken Cheng 2. "Trump's nothing like Hitler. There's no way he could write a book" - Frankie Boyle 3. "I've given up asking rhetorical questions. What's the point?" - Alexei Sayle 4. "I'm looking for the girl next door type. I'm just gonna keep moving house till I find her" - Lew Fitz 5. "I like to imagine the guy who invented the umbrella was going to call it the 'brella'. But he hesitated" - Andy Field 6. "Combine Harvesters. And you'll have a really big restaurant" - Mark Simmons 7. "I'm rubbish with names. It's not my fault, it's a condition. There's a name for it..." - Jimeoin 8. "I have two boys, 5 and 6. We're no good at naming things in our house" - Ed Byrne 9. "I wasn't particularly close to my dad before he died... which was lucky, because he trod on a landmine" - Olaf Falafel 10. "Whenever someone says, 'I don't believe in coincidences.' I say, 'Oh my God, me neither!"' - Alasdair Beckett-King 11. "A friend tricked me into going to Wimbledon by telling me it was a men's singles event" - Angela Barnes 12. "As a vegan, I think people who sell meat are disgusting; but apparently people who sell fruit and veg are grocer" - Adele Cliff 13. "For me dying is a lot like going camping. I don't want to do it" - Phil Wang 14. "I wonder how many chameleons snuck onto the Ark" - Adam Hess 15. "I went to a Pretenders gig. It was a tribute act" - Tim Vine Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged 22-08-2017 08:20 AM 5709 Registered: Jul 2003 Posts: 37053 - Threads: 2585 Location: 2016 Winner Meltdown Winner Redeeming They all have an air of Milton Jones to them, who I love, and it's also good to see Alexei Sayle back. Always liked him too. And that number one is lame. Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged 22-08-2017 08:34 AM Latex Zebra Yeah, something is probably happening somewhere. Registered: Feb 2003 Posts: 15057 - Threads: 341 Location: London 2016 óò Winner KING CON Joint Winner Day Party - Alumni Honourable Mention Tune - Mind Shift - Luke Warner and Latex Zebra Winner DJ Winner Resident DJ Winner Party Animal Winner Club Night - Zoology 15 Quote: Matt wrote on 22-08-2017 08:20 AM 9. "I wasn't particularly close to my dad before he died... which was lucky, because he trod on a landmine" - Olaf Falafel My kind of joke. Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged 22-08-2017 09:09 AM ceekay venomous fairy Registered: Feb 2010 Posts: 39935 - Threads: 1064 Location: In a wide open space 2016 Winner Thread Honourable Mention Member 9, 14, 15 got small smiles. "Do you believe in the devil? You know, a supreme evil being dedicated to the temptation, corruption, and destruction of man?" "I'm not sure that man needs the help." (Calvin & Hobbes) Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged 22-08-2017 09:29 AM Private1 Registered: Aug 2002 Posts: 40942 - Threads: 1198 Location: London Quote: ceekay wrote on 22-08-2017 09:29 AM 9, 14, 15 got small smiles. Botox day? There was a man in front of me in the queue in tesco's buying condoms. When the cashier asked if he needed a bag, he said "No, she isn't that ugly" Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged 22-08-2017 13:41 PM ceekay venomous fairy Registered: Feb 2010 Posts: 39935 - Threads: 1064 Location: In a wide open space 2016 Winner Thread Honourable Mention Member Quote: Private1 wrote on 22-08-2017 01:41 PM Botox day? "Do you believe in the devil? You know, a supreme evil being dedicated to the temptation, corruption, and destruction of man?" "I'm not sure that man needs the help." (Calvin & Hobbes) Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged 22-08-2017 13:59 PM All times are GMT. 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